stoopid is

Chronicles of my constant mishaps and retarded nature.

Friday, June 15, 2007

Tales from the chair

Every day is a new challenge in the hairdressing industry. We never know what crazy person will walk through the door next, what employee drama will arise or in todays case, what will break.
As I'm calling my next client back for her haircut she whispers "I think the toilet is broken." No biggie, I'm pretty handy when it comes to fixing things. I scamper off to fix what in theory is a simple situation(I should know better by now) when I open the door to the womans bathroom. "MAY DAY! MAY DAY! The Titanic has resurfaced and all the dead bodies smell awful."

Time to call the plumber because my degree is in beauty not doodie.

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Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Ticks ok, I'm a professional

So this ten year old kid sits in my chair today excited to chop off about 8 inches of his hair down to a buzz cut. I start my clippers and the hair starts falling when he nonchalantly says;

Oh by the way, I might have ticks!
*did I just hear that right?*
ME; Oh really?
HIS MOM: (laughing) Oh honey your so silly.
KID; (continues blathering about kid stuff) Blah blah blah....
buzz buzz buzz
KID; Blah blah blah...
buzz buzz buzz
ME; Well...I guess you were right!
KID; (very excited and jumping around) Really!!! I wanna see! I wanna see!

Meanwhile the full waiting room of clients is now cringing and looking at us like we're circus freaks. The mom rushes the kid outside to remove the hitchiker then brings him back in for me to complete the haircut.
There is no redemption for this one.

The saga continues...

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Monday, June 11, 2007

Hair I am

Well, life has taken me full circle. I left the east coast in search of new things and new things I found. I'm a total slacker when it comes to blogging about everything these days and all the nifty things I've done in the last 4 years but we'll just say it's a lot.

He's a brief history;
I've been all over the USA traveling, writing, and taking photos. I've worked as a writer, automotive mods salesperson, t-shirt designer, payroll specialist, among numerous other things. I even quit hairdressing for two years. I've lived in Glendale, AZ, Scottsdale, AZ, Los Angeles, CA, Marina Del Rey, CA and San Diego, CA.

Now after very little persuasion I'm back in my beloved Carolinas. Oh how I missed this place. I'm not quite back where I started but I'm close. I say Carolinas because I find myself so close to the North & South Carolina border I could throw a rock into one of the states. After my two year career hiatus I'm back to hair dressing. It's amazing how many of the disturbing things I blocked out from my former profession. I always had ridiculous stories to tell people of my time served...and I do mean time served. Some days being a hair dresser is down right torturous. When I die I'll probably go to heaven because I've already served my time in Hell. I've been back in the industry less than two weeks and already I've encountered Lice, nesting spiders, cradle cap, cutting myself, confessions to murder, screaming children, unimaginable stink, and accidentally chopping off someone's skin tag (it was a BIG skin tag) all while trying to keep a strait face and making them look better (well...some of them look better).

some days I question things...but I'm still happy to be back.

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