DESTROYING LIVES; One text message at a time

So there I was, sitting in my Psychology class listening to my teacher blather on. I noticed one of my fellow classmates giggling and flirting with a girl. He’s a cool guy and she seems nifty, maybe I’ll give him a little nudge to go for it. So I sent him a text message.

ME; Are you getting the hook-up or what?

I giggled and waited to see the look on his face but nothing happened. Maybe his phone is on silent I thought, he’ll get it after class and probably be confused as to what I’m talking about. I soon forgot about the message, left class, went home and fell fast asleep.

Bright and early this morning I hear the familiar buzz of my phone alerting me to a new message. Sure enough it was Alvin…well, that’s what I thought.

NOT ALVIN; Who are you?

ME; It’s Emily, I saw you flirting with that girl in class last night.

NOT ALVIN; I don’t know you

Before I could respond

NOT ALVIN again; What school do you go to and who are you sending this message to?

Realizing I had programmed Alvin’s number wrong into my phone

ME; Oops, sorry. I’m dyslexic and typed the number in wrong

NOT ALVIN; Ok hope you’re not sending this message to Brandon

ME; Nope

This was the end of our conversation. Now at this point it doesn’t seem very significant or entertaining at the least. Just a misguided text message right? Wrong! Dead wrong. I processed the situation a little more. They said “hope” they hoped I wasn’t sending the message to Brandon. This wasn’t an act of good will trying to make sure that Brandon got the message in case I really did type the number in right. This was the act of someone else, someone who thinks I’m lying about having the wrong number trying to cover my tracks. Here are the scenarios as to who was writing me back.

1. It was Brandon’s mother. He’s probably a 12 year old Mormon boy currently getting yelled at by his mom. “Who is this Emily person and you’re too young to flirt with girls! Consider yourself grounded young man!” she would then sulk off crying because her little boy might not be a little boy much longer.
2. It was Brandon's Dad. Well we know it wasn't because he wouldn't have said "hope" but just incase he would be patting his son on the back saying "So did you get the girl's number?"
   
3. It was Brandon’s girlfriend. They have probably had numerous trust issues in the past and this is probably the straw that will break the camel’s back. I can hear her now, poor Brandon probably couldn’t get a word of defense in at all. (insert tears of scorned female) “You’re such an asshole! Who were you flirting with last night? You said you loved me! You said it would never happen again! You’re a liar! I never want to see you again!” She then smashes his phone, eliminating any possibility of calling me to find out I really don’t know Brandon.
4. It was Brandon’s boyfriend. See scenario above, only difference is They will end up in a cat fight tearing off each others clothing and then screw like jack rabbits because they’re men and men like to screw. This scenario will repeat itself many times over until they’ve finally had enough of each other.

So thus you have my 3 stories. If you have a better one feel free to include it. I am officially an evil horrible person, purely by accident of course. This reminds me of the time I drove by a couple holding hands and yelled “Fuck him, I did!” the girl immediately slapped the guy. I was not an accidental evil person in this case, I was just young but it sure was funny.

So to Brandon you poor poor boy, good luck today.