stoopid is

Chronicles of my constant mishaps and retarded nature.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

He Likes Me! He Really Likes Me!

For the past couple of weeks when exiting my car to go to school I keep eyeballing this open manhole. For some reason it kept catching my eye. Now I don’t know if I was staring at it because I’m clumsy and know that I would end up stepping in it or because my obsessive compulsive curiosity was getting the best of me. Let me explain the realms of my OCC (Excessive compulsive curiosity). I’m the type of person that has to know the dumbest things, like if I’m at someone’s house using the restroom and the shower curtain is closed I have to look behind it. I’m not looking for anything, I just simply must know why it’s closed. Is the bathtub nasty? Is there a dead body? Do they use good hair products? If I’m driving and I see a trash bag or dilapidated box on the side of the road I automatically assume there is at least one chopped up body part inside, I have resisted the urge my whole life to stop and find out, I’d rather just settle for the worst case scenario. It has taken me years to break the habit of label pealing or tag snipping, it was quite the pain in the ass to show up at the store and not know what size undergarments to wear or toothpaste you use. Bra shopping is hard enough when you know the size let alone when you don’t. Now I know you’re probably thinking, this girl is insane. Really I’m not, I just have a touch of OCD in different forms, it’s very minor and usually I just ignore it. All though it does bother my boyfriend sometimes that I always have to know why. If I ask a question and he says “No.” then that should be good enough for me…but it’s not, my OCC takes over and I ask why until he wants to flog me or gives up and thinks I’m mentally challenged.

So anyway, back to the topic at hand. I showed up for school and there it was, the manhole, still with its cover half off and still calling to me. I looked around to see if anyone was watching me, walked over to it and peered in. “Ooohh there’s something down there…it’s probably just trash.” I thought. Then I leaned in succumbing to my curiosity. “It’s a CD! I wonder what CD it is?” I started fantasizing about what horrible atrocity awaited me, “Something terrible I’m sure. Gangster rap perhaps? Or better yet, Mexican Gangster rap!” I reached into the dark hole and pulled out a brown CD…”I recognized this….Holy crap! It’s Primus, the Brown Album!”. Thank you God if you really exist. I must have done something right, the CD isn’t even skipping and this is the one Primus album I don’t have.

I went to work the nest day happy and content with my new CD. I was sitting at my desk going through my head on how I wanted to blog my little story when I started thinking “Now all I need is for god to give me a Cadbury Cream Egg.” (I swear to you I actually thought that). Right then I hear a voice from the cubicle next to me “There’s an easter basket full of chocolate goodies for everyone at the front desk!” I was stunned, but no way did God like me this much. I walked up to the desk to see the heavenly basket of goods. Looks like I was right, it’s just chocolate. Wait….what’s that? “He likes me! He really likes me!” The skies have opened up and rained Brown upon my soul. I have a Primus CD and a Cadbury Cream Egg. Oh happy days. I don’t know what I did but I sure hope I do it again. Don’t good things come in 3’s? I wonder what brown goodness will come my way next?….er….don’t answer that.


At 4/15/06, 7:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hahahah. Only you would receive gifts of brown from the almighty. ; )

Big <3 Heather.

At 4/17/06, 7:04 PM, Blogger Rod Skullcrusher said...

You find a Primus CD and you have a Cadbury Cream Egg? Sounds like the Easter Bunny was on your side this year.

At 4/18/06, 10:06 AM, Blogger Stoopidgirl said...

tell me about's kind of creapy.


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